Research Shows Marriage Changes People for the Better in Newlywed Years

Research has long shown that marriage adjusts men and women’s personalities for the better through marriage. But a groundbreaking longitudinal study published in the journal Developmental Psychology demonstrates how this happens in strong ways in the first two years of marriage. It also shows how these changes affect long-term marital satisfaction. It is the first such study to examine this important dynamic in early marriage.

These researchers, working collaboratively from the University of Georgia and UCLA, explain their “findings indicate that newlywed spouses’ personalities undergo meaningful changes during the newlywed years and these changes are associated with changes in spouses’ marital satisfaction.”

They also found that these personality benefits happened within marriage, but not during the cohabiting years for those couples who had cohabited prior to marriage. This indicates that the relationally clarifying experience of marriage has an impact on how husbands and wives change and adjust that the relationally ambiguous experience of cohabitation does not provide.

These researchers found that husbands, in the first 18 months of marriage, demonstrated “significant declines in extraversion” meaning they settled down into their marital relationship, focusing on their wife and marriage. This is supported by earlier research by Nobel prize winning scholar George Akerlof who concludes, “There is no question that there is a very large difference in behavior between single and married men.” He adds that “men settle down when they get married” and “if they fail to get married, they fail to settle down.”

Husbands were also shown to demonstrate “a significant increase in conscientiousness” thus becoming more wife-focused, responsible, organized and dependable.

Wives also demonstrated “significant declines in neuroticism” which is clinical language for reductions in anxiety, depression, hostility, self-consciousness, impulsiveness and vulnerability to stress.

These positive changes existed for husbands and wives regardless of age, length of premarital relationship or other baseline differences.

A negative was that these researchers also found that “agreeableness” of husbands and wives declined on average, noting this as “a more maladaptive change” and that “this surprising finding is inconsistent with previous research.” They assume this could be due to adjustments in the transitional nature of marriage, going from a single and courtship posture into an established marriage life negotiation of having to consider the needs and particular desires of a spouse. They hypothesize that agreeableness would increase as the couple adjusts to one another in their married life together.

The study authors conclude, “Taken together, these findings indicate that newlywed spouses’ personalities undergo meaningful changes during the newlywed years and these changes are associated with changes in spouses’ marital satisfaction.”

A heightened sense of conscientiousness in husbands and lowered presence of anxiety in wives translated into greater marital satisfaction for the couple in the long run.

This research shows that marriage is indeed different than cohabitation in that it transforms the husband and wife in notable ways. Marriage clarifies the nature of the relationship through its solemn vows, binding legal status and public celebration before the bride and groom’s family and friends. It is helpful to observe its transformative power through good social science.

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