Epstein, Coldplay Kiss Cam and Confirmation of Sexual Standards
It’s been next to impossible to have perused any news site this past week without seeing multiple references to the ongoing Jeffrey Epstein files case and the story involving the disgraced former CEO and head of human resources at Astronomer, the tech start-up.
Caught on camera at a Coldplay concert earlier this month, lead singer Chris Martin quipped of the philandering couple captured in an embrace, “Either they’re having an affair or they’re just very shy.”
As it turns out, the former caused the latter.
On Wednesday, a federal judge denied the Trump administration’s request to release grand jury transcripts from an investigation of the late convicted child sex-offender Epstein and his accomplice, Ghislaine Maxwell. Citing the “endless efforts to politicize the Epstein investigation,” House Speaker Mike Johnson recessed Congress early in an effort to sidestep and delay anticipated legislative action on the investigation.
Both stories exhaust and turn off discerning readers, especially people with moral conviction. Sexual abuse and adultery are awful topics, but in the media world, they also seem to garner a lot of gawkers and clicks.
Yet in addition to all the web traffic they generate, both stories have also been generating and eliciting a lot of derision and disgust. In an increasingly “anything goes” sexual era, have the American people suddenly rediscovered a moral foundation?
To be sure, the Epstein reprisal appears to be prime political fodder for activists eager to exploit its tawdriness to enact maximum electoral damage.
But the Coldplay Kiss Cam?
Surveys consistently show that the vast majority of Americans believe it’s morally wrong to cheat on a spouse. Yet, in recent years, there’s also been research showing moral inconsistencies related to infidelity.
According to the data:
“Seventy percent of women say that a married man who has an affair is always morally wrong, while fewer (56%) say the same when married women have relationships outside their marriage.”
The gap is even wider when the question is posed to younger women, with 71% thinking a man having an affair is wrong, compared to just 51% if the woman is the offender. Women with post-graduate degrees are even more permissive, with just 41% suggesting a woman having an extra-marital affair is always wrong.
Why the glaring double standard?
Presumably, some of the explanation may be attributable to the perception that women are straying from their marital vows because their husbands have strayed from theirs. That’s a big assumption, and one that brings the popular adage to mind: two wrongs don’t make a right.
Andy Byron, the CEO caught in the adulterous embrace at the Coldplay concert, issued a statement in the days following the news acknowledging the “disappointment” he caused. He apologized to his wife and family, but then went on to say the video capture “should have been a private moment.”
Only our marriage vows are typically made in public, because our family, friends and broader community serve as witnesses to the couple’s promise of lifelong fidelity. We wear rings as a public declaration of the union.
Marriage isn’t just romantic – it’s cultural and socially consequential.
It might surprise people to learn that adultery is still considered a crime in 16 states and Puerto Rico: Arizona, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Kansas, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, New York, North Carolina, Oklahoma, South Carolina, Utah and Wisconsin.
In fact, in Michigan, Oklahoma and Wisconsin, extramarital sex is considered a felony.
The New York Post, known for its tabloid, sensational headlines, ran a series of photos of the couple on the concert big screen along with the headline, “DUMBOTRON!!”
Only adultery is no laughing matter. It doesn’t just damage or destroy unions between husband and wife but blows apart children’s relationships with mom and dad, upends family cohesiveness, and threatens to sow seeds of discord for future generations.
These harsh realities don’t seem lost on the American people, especially given their interest and disgust over this very public affair. Perhaps the ugly spectacle and consequences of it might discourage observers from walking down a similar path. In the meantime, prayers for the children and spouses victimized by this affair would certainly be in order.
Image from X.
